Feelings and Fears
by Trinity005
Summary: This story takes place sometime in the middle of 3rd season. Lynn/Rex/Joe.
1. It Happened

"Feelings and Fears"  
  
Chapter 1 - "It Happened"  
  
It was 7:00 a.m. and Joe Celano was already in his office. Actually, he was still in his office, because he stayed there all night. He had two cases that he had to study for the next week. Plus, he had a lot of thinking to do - about his situation with Vivica, and about his job. He loved working as a lawyer, but he couldn't help getting too involved. Suddenly, he remembered about some notes he had left on Lynn's office the day before.  
  
As he searched through Lynn's table and drawers, he noticed a small paper, like a memo, fall on the floor. He caught and didn't mean to read it, but when he glanced the words "My Dear Lynn" written with Rex's handwriting, it was impossible to control himself.  
  
And it said:  
  
"My Dear Lynn  
  
You know when you wait for something to happen for a long time? This was the way I felt about us all those years.  
  
The funny thing is that I hadn't realized it until that night. You were in front of me all the time and just now I see how much you mean to me.  
  
And, if I'm sad for all the time we've missed, and as glad as I can be for what we have ahead of us.  
  
Rex"  
  
Joe stood behind Lynn's desk for over a minute. Lynn and Rex? God, it had to be a joke. Then suddenly he brought back to reality by Randi, who entered the office.  
  
"Good Morning, Joe." Randi said, wondering what he was doing there.  
  
"Oh, hi, Randi." Joe answered weakly, still taken aback by that note. He suddenly realized he was still holding it and quickly put it back where it was before.  
  
"So, I see you've found out about Lynn and Rex."  
  
"You knew it?"  
  
"Well, I can see."  
  
"For how long?"  
  
"The flirting? I could say a few weeks. The action? I still haven't found a way to make Lynn tell me."  
  
"I'm so surprised."  
  
"Disappointed?" "I said surprised."  
  
"Hum... disappointed."  
  
"Randi!"  
  
"Too late, Joe. You can't say you didn't have a chance." Randi said leaving the office and not giving Joe a chance to answer.  
  
But it didn't matter since he had nothing to say. He quickly grabbed the notes he was looking for and left the office, because he heard Lynn's voice not very far.  
  
Lynn and Joe met in the hall.  
  
"Hey, Joe." Lynn said, as usual.  
  
"Hi, Lynn. Everything OK?"  
  
"Couldn't be better." She said getting into her office and sitting on her chair. Joe followed her.  
  
"Oh, Lynn, I took the notes from the Gordon-Lewis case. They were on your desk."  
  
"Great. I really want to discuss some points with you. Come here when you finish reading it." As she looked through the papers lying on her desk, she came across Rex's note.  
  
"Lynn?"  
  
"Oh. Yes. Me." She was suddenly awaken by Randi's voice. "Where's Joe?"  
  
"My God, Lynn. He left about tem minutes ago to his office. Where have you been?"  
  
"I have a lot on my mind. Have you seen Rex?" She sounded embarrassed to ask those questions, something which Randi cleverly noticed.  
  
"Yesterday he had he would go straight to court this morning, and come here in the afternoon." Randi smiled as she said that making Lynn feel even more uncomfortable.  
  
Randi left, and Lynn rested on her chair, looking to the ceiling. She was so confused. The worst is that she had so much work to do, but it was impossible to concentrate. "Randi knows it." Lynn thought. "And... Joe?" Only the though of Joe's name was enough to make Lynn be agitated and shaky. Something that she didn't understand, since she had enjoyed so much that night with Rex. "You haven't talked to him yet, Lynn. Don't act like a woman and hope for something." She said to herself.  
  
"Lynn? Are you busy?" Joe's voice brought Lynn back to the office.  
  
"Oh, yes, Joe, sure. What do you want?"  
  
"I've read your notes on the Gordon-Lewis case and I was hoping we could talk about them."  
  
"OK. There are many points we must talk about before the hearing this Friday."  
  
As Joe sat in front of Lynn and began to talk about the case, Lynn did her best to concentrate and forget for a moment that Rex existed.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	2. I Try

"Feelings and Fears"  
  
Chapter 2 - "I Try"  
  
It's the night before. Rex was in his office, getting ready to leave. He took another look on Lynn's office direction - she hasn't come back. "I can't believe I didn't have a chance to talk to her yet." He thinks. "I wish I knew what she's thinking."  
  
As he was leaving the office - he was the only one in there, Joe had left to buy dinner. "Damn it! Tomorrow I have to go court, I won't be able to see her until the afternoon." He said to no one. Then he thought, "I think I'll leave her a note. She'll like it." Then he went to her office and began to write.  
  
"Yes. Perfect. She'll love this." Rex said to himself as he re-read the note for the tenth time. He looked through the desk for the perfect place to leave it. He decided to leave it right in front of the chair, so she would see it as soon as she sat down.  
  
Lynn's silence was killing him. She had told him she didn't want him to feel obligated to call her the next day. However, he did call her, only to hear over ten times her voice on the answering machine. He left one short message. "Hi Lynn. It's Rex. Call me. I don't need to say why." Now, thinking about it, Rex thought the message was awful. He shouldn't have asked her to call him. Maybe it was not polite. "Why am I so confused?" He thought as he drove back home. "She's not the first woman I sleep with." He parked the car on his driveway. He got home and immediately checked his messages. Nothing. He sighed with disappointment. "I can't believe she's doing this." He calls Lynn again, but gets her answering machine one more time. This time he doesn't leave a message. He goes to his bedroom, sure it won't be easy to sleep that night.  
  
***  
  
The following day. Lynn is at her office. She has just read Rex's note. She's recalling all the thinking she did this morning and the day before.  
  
7:00 a.m. Lynn has just dropped her kids at school. She's heading to her office, a million things on her mind. As she looks around, she finds a CD on the passenger seat. "Oh, Cassie," She thinks. She puts the CD on the radio. "How could I sleep with Rex?" She thinks in the meantime. The CD begins to play, as Lynn drives and thinks of mess her life is now.  
  
On the radio, Macy Gray is singing.  
  
"Games, changes and fears  
  
When will they go from here  
  
When will they stop  
  
I believe that fate has brought us here"  
  
Lynn smiles as Macy Gray goes on. "We had a perfect friendship. OK, not perfect." Lynn thinks. "But at least I knew what it was, I knew what I should expect." She sighs. "Now it feels like I don't have a ground to step on." She stops at a red light. "He did call me, though. Why didn't I call him back? Why didn't I pick up the phone last night when I knew he was calling." The light has already turned green but Lynn is so lost in her thoughts she doesn't realize it. She's awaken by the horns of the drivers behind her.  
  
Macy Gray is still playing.  
  
"I try to say goodbye and I choke  
  
Try to walk away and I stumble  
  
Though I try to hide it, it's clear  
  
My world crumbles when you're not near"  
  
Lynn smiles again as she listens to last words of the song. "I have to talk to Rex right now." She thinks as she parks her car and enters the office.  
  
However, Rex was not there that morning. All she could do now was concentrate in the Gordon-Lewis case she was working on with Joe. "Joe. I thought no one could confuse more than you." She thought as he sat down in front of her to discuss the case.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	3. I Just Can't Help Believing

"Feelings and Fears"  
  
Chapter 3 - "I Just Can't Help Believing"  
  
1:00 p.m. Lynn paces her office. Every now and then she checks outside to see if Rex has arrived. She reads the note again. "Well, he's not really saying he loves me," She ponders. "But he talks about 'what we have ahead of us'." She laughs to herself. "I'm afraid of that."  
  
"Hey Lynn, you're certainly happy today," Joe says entering her office. Lynn is embarrassed he caught her daydreaming.  
  
"I was just remembering something Rupie said this morning," She tries.  
  
"He and Cassie are going to spend the week with Michael, aren't they?" Joe asks.  
  
"Yes. His parents are visiting, and they wanted to spend some time with Cassie and Rupie." Lynn answers, slightly sad.  
  
"It must feel awful to sleep in that house with no one else around."  
  
"Oh, yes, it is."  
  
"We could go out and have dinner, one day or two. So you won't feel lonely." He says, smiling.  
  
"Oh, Joe, that's... very nice."  
  
"So, is it a date?" He asks, quite casually. Lynn is taken aback and can't answer immediately.  
  
"I, I don't know. It could be." She says, not wanting to be rude and tell him she had other plans.  
  
"Great. What about tomorrow?" He says, getting up and heading to the door.  
  
"Fine with me." Lynn answers, still unsure of what she's doing.  
  
Joe opens the door. "I'll pick up at your place at 8." As he turns to leave, he almost bumps against Rex, who doesn't look too friendly.  
  
"Oh, hi, Rex. How was at the court today?" Joe asks.  
  
"Fine. I won." Rex answers getting into Lynn's office and sitting down. Joe closes the door, laughing to himself at that scene.  
  
"So, I see you have a date today." Rex asks Lynn.  
  
"It's actually tomorrow," she replies, and then tries to fix it, "But I could cancel it."  
  
"And why would you do that?" Rex says, resting on the chair, trying to look natural.  
  
Lynn doesn't answer. She looks at the paper at her desk. "Because I'd rather be with you," She thinks. She looks at Rex. "You tell me. You're the one who hates Joe."  
  
Rex laughs. "I have nothing against Joe, really," He says. "Actually, in some aspects I wish I were like him." He says, getting up and starting to pace the room.  
  
"And what would be those?" Lynn asks with surprise.  
  
Rex thinks for a minute. "The ability he has to get into your heart so easily." He smiles sadly as that thought comes to his mind. Lynn notices it.  
  
"So, Rex, in what aspects you wish like Joe?" Lynn insists.  
  
"Well, can't name them all now, but for example... he has a nice hair."  
  
Lynn smiles. "So do you, Rex."  
  
They keep smiling at each other. "We can't really talk here. Won't you come to my place tonight?" Lynn asks.  
  
"My God, I feel so used." Rex says. Lynn can't tell if he's joking or talking seriously.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"You have a date with me tonight, and then you have one with Joe tomorrow."  
  
"Rex, shut up. I don't have a date with Joe, he just doesn't want me to feel lonely, since Michael has the kids this week."  
  
"Oh, Joe is such a wonderful person."  
  
"I already said I could cancel it."  
  
"But you couldn't find a reason to do it." Rex says sitting on the side of Lynn's desk.  
  
"You asking me to would be a good one." She replies.  
  
Rex is speechless. "It's good to know that," He eventually says. He gets up. "So, what time do you want me to be at your place?" He asks.  
  
"Anytime you want." She replies.  
  
***  
  
It's about 6 p.m. and Lynn is arriving at her house. When she gets out of the car, carrying two bags of groceries, she's more than surprised to find Rex sitting on the porch.  
  
"Rex, what are you doing here?" Lynn asks.  
  
"I thought we're going to talk." He says, getting up.  
  
"Yes, but, I..." She can't figure out an answer. Rex takes her grocery bags and she opens the door.  
  
"I'm going to take this to the kitchen," He says. Lynn nods and follows him.  
  
"Can I get you something to eat?" She asks, looking into the bags. "You know, I was going to prepare something, but I didn't expect..." Rex takes her hands off the bags.  
  
"Leave it, Lynn. You know I don't want anything to eat."  
  
"OK." She smiles. "Neither do I."  
  
"Why didn't you answer my calls?" Rex asks. Lynn is taken aback by his objectiveness.  
  
"I'm sorry, Rex."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I was afraid."  
  
"Afraid of me?"  
  
"No, no. Afraid of... believing. I didn't want to get hurt again, and,..." She can't go on.  
  
"And it was me."  
  
"No, Rex, is not that."  
  
"And it wasn't Joe."  
  
"Oh, Rex. Not that again."  
  
"Lynn, I don't want you to have dinner with him tomorrow."  
  
"You don't?" Lynn's eyes are shining. "Why?"  
  
"Because, if you need company this week that your kids are with Michael, than I think I'm a better company."  
  
"Why are you so sure of that?" She asks, flirtatious. They are so close know their bodies are almost touching.  
  
"Because I..." He's interrupted by the doorbell. "Damn it," He says to himself as Lynn goes to see who's there.  
  
"What are you doing here?" She says when she opens the door.  
  
"It's something that couldn't wait." Joe says. "Can I come in?"  
  
"No, you can't," Rex answers, coming from the kitchen. "I arrived here first."  
  
"Rex, what the hell are you doing here?" Joe asks.  
  
"None of your business. Now, go." He begins to push Joe outside.  
  
"Rex!" Lynn tries to stop that, unsuccessfully.  
  
"Rex, you're a jerk." Joe says as they get outside.  
  
"Look who's talking." He leads Joe to his car. "Another thing, pal, forget the dinner tomorrow."  
  
"And why would I do that?"  
  
"Because I'm telling you to. Now beat it." Joe is extremely annoyed, but decides to leave without arguing anymore. Lynn is standing by the door - she's trying to look annoyed, but on the inside she's loving the scene.  
  
After Joe leaves, Rex gets back in the house. "So, let's go back to where we were." He says, holding Lynn's hand.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	4. Taking a Chance on Love

"Feelings and Fears"  
  
Chapter 4 - "Taking a Chance on Love"  
  
Lynn and Rex remained silent for a few moments. "I still can't believe this," Lynn thinks. "One month ago, if someone came in and said I would be involved with Rex, I would laugh out loud." She sighs and smiles.  
  
"What?" Rex asks.  
  
"I'm just happy," She replies, leading him into the living room. They sit on the couch. "So, you were saying..." She says.  
  
He puts her arm around her, on the couch. "Lynn, you're probably as taken aback as me by this whole situation. For over two years, we've worked together, and, I'm not going to say I never stopped to think how beautiful you are," He smiles mischievously, "but I never really thought one day we would come to this point."  
  
Lynn smiles. "I can't recall how many times you annoyed, irritated me and I just wanted to tell you to go to hell." She touches his cheek. "It all seems so distant now."  
  
"You did get in my nerves a few times, too." They get closer. "Not in my wildest dreams I would imagine what happened between us the other night."  
  
"Why did it happen, Rex?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Yes. I mean, we know each other for such a long time, and now..."  
  
"Does it matter?"  
  
"Well, it has to, doesn't it?"  
  
"Says who?"  
  
"Rex, stop being yourself."  
  
"OK, OK. I'm going to give it a try. Maybe it was because we never really looked at each other until that night. I'm not sure if you know what I mean."  
  
"Yes, I do. That was very beautiful Rex." She smiles.  
  
"Yeah, but I don't think it was the reason." He shakes his head. "I think you just lost your mind."  
  
"Well, let's just pray I'll never find it again."  
  
As they both leaned for a kiss, the phone rang.  
  
"Oh, brother." Rex said, annoyed, as Lynn reached for the phone.  
  
"Hello?" Lynn answers the phone. "Hi, Lynn. It's Randi."  
  
"It's Randi," Lynn whispers to Rex, who's still cursing everyone in the world under his breath.  
  
"Say hi to her for me," Rex says, sarcastically.  
  
"Do you have someone with you?" Randi asks."  
  
"No, not really," Lynn lies.  
  
"Hey!" Rex exclaims, looking at Lynn. She slaps his arm.  
  
"Oh my God, Rex is there. I'm so sorry. I feel awful." Randi says.  
  
"Why would you?" Lynn asks, wondering if Randi knows.  
  
Randi laughs. "Oh, Lynn, don't underestimate my intelligence."  
  
Lynn smiles embarrassed while she thinks of an answer.  
  
"Oh, Lynn, I can perfectly see you smiling, as shyly as a teenager caught with her first boyfriend."  
  
"Don't worry, Randi. We weren't doing anything." Lynn says, still smiling.  
  
"Yeah, nobody is letting us." Rex is still complaining. Lynn just looks at him.  
  
"Randi, if you have a problem," Lynn begins.  
  
"No, I just thought you were alone. Now go back and enjoy life a little bit. Of course you could do better than Rex, but, what the hell, it's better than having no one."  
  
"Thanks, Randi. I know you're supporting me. In some way." Lynn says.  
  
They hang up. Rex is pacing the room. Lynn observes him.  
  
"Rex..." She calls him.  
  
"You know, Lynn, I have a feeling our co-workers are not very fond of the idea of us together."  
  
Lynn laughs. "Well, maybe it would be better of we got to the point. At least I have a point."  
  
"Yeah, me too."  
  
"Go, ahead then."  
  
"Why me first?"  
  
"Well... because you arrived here first."  
  
"OK. You win." He stops. "I love you, Lynn. I want us to go on."  
  
Lynn gets up and holds Rex. "Rex, I love you too." She buries her head in his chest. "I'm scared to death because of it, but, I, I don't care anymore."  
  
"Don't worry, Lynn. I won't disappoint you." He kisses her hair.  
  
They look at each other and kiss passionately. Rex takes Lynn in her arms and carries her to the bedroom.  
  
A few hours afterwards, they're lying in the bed, Lynn's head is on Rex's chest.  
  
"Rex, do you think this will last?" Lynn asks.  
  
"I have no idea, Lynn."  
  
She smiles. "Oh, me neither."  
  
"I know you'll do my best."  
  
"Me too."  
  
They kiss.  
  
***THE END*** 


End file.
